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[Archived] The Venky Arms


ABBEY

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I saw a Watchdog-style TV programme a while ago about a pub where they'd left industrial cleaning fluids on the toilet seat. A customer sat down and had half her arse burned away, and the owners argued, delayed, and eventually shut up shop to avoid paying compensation for her ruined cheeks.

The Venky Arms would be like that, except they'd charge you 50p to use the toilets.

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There'd be a cabbage patch at the front where the once lush bowling green used to be. Al the staff would be on stupidly high wages but would sit around all day doing naff all, except for the one local lad whose uncle used to run it before he passed away who would try his best but couldn't make up for the other slackers.

There'd also be a new landlord every other week.

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Following the interview with shabby minge where he says fans couldn't run a bar , what do you think The Venky Arms would be ...

I reckon watered down ale and microwaved meals and customers abused by the bar staff.

It would be now be boarded up like most Blackburn pubs.

Thanks Labour/Islam

Very NSFW.

A very moving composition.

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It would be the Hacienda. Proper working class venue, designed for the common man, popular whilst being unfashionable. Got much bigger than it ever should and despised by those outside the area for daring to upset the status quo.

But ultimately a mixture of naive business practices, a real lack of forward thinking and making a deal with the wrong people then finding they can't control them meant that despite having everything on a plate and loyal following they eventually had to close the doors as it was losing so much money.

..... I won't go so far as to remind everyone that what finally did for the hacienda was somebody accidentally handing over the wrong set of books.

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Only portuguese unknown beer that will probably taste like @#/? but will be described as "the new guinness"

I got a bit monstered on Poretuguese stout and beer once at a Portuguese bar in London.

They kept on serving us spicy chopped liver univited as well.

Never felt so rough as I did the next day.

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