How about this, to the tune of Amy Winehouse's "Rehab:" They tried to make him sign for Bolton - he said, no, no, no!! Well, I like it.

Reading their forum (albiet on Babelfish), they seem pretty cocky about it. They're also wondering if we'll play our ex-Liverpool star Matteo. http://www.redbullsalzburg-board.com/board...?showtopic=8070 (Go to www.altavista.com and click on Babel Fish for a translation)

The full groups: http://www.uefa.com/competitions/UEFACup/n...sId=448958.html Hopefully, West Ham will get Parma and Spuds will get Leverkusen.

We're in Group 3 of the draw. The unseeded teams that we could play are Hearts, Nancy (France), Sulte Waregem (Belgium), FC Salzburg (Austria), and Randers (Denmark). At least we won't have to travel too far! Paul beat me to it!

Wasn't Alan Fettis the one who played a few games upfront for Hull and scored for them?

Let's see... The Velvet Underground & Nico - Self-titled The Beatles - Sargeant Peppers' Robert Johnson - King Of The Delta Blues Singers Marvin Gaye - What's Going On The Beach Boys - Pet Sounds Miles Davis - Kind Of Blue Jimi Hendrix - Are You Experienced? Pink Floyd - Dark Side Herbie Hancock - Head Hunters Black Sabbath - Self-titled Radiohead - The Bends 11... not bad.

So the message there would be that match-fixers can't be allowed into the Champions League, but they're alright to play in the UEFA Cup? Hopefully it won't happen though - as Phillip said, they're appealing on a technicality and the Italian FA/UEFA will surely give Empoli the go-ahead to play in Europe.

Note how that site has Mido as part of our squad list.

Yeah, where's that from tchocky? I haven't been able to find anything on the net.

Arse! I've been sat here in work for the past hour, hoping to liven up my day by seeing Juve dumped down a few divisions.

Phillip's right; there's no way that Coventry would have offered him anywhere near £10k a week, and MH will have known that when he offered the contract. To make that sort of money, Jeffers will have to perform. And if there's one thing Franny Jeffers loves, it's money, so Sparky might well have found the right way to motivate him.

Well yeah, that could work too...

As much as I hate the little nancy-boy, I can't help but feeling that the Ronaldo-bashing is going to get over the top. I feel sorry for his family now, and anyone close to him who'll have to suffer the consequences of his cheating. I've always thought that FIFA missed a trick in the last World Cup when Rivaldo did the dying swan against Turkey. If they had balls they'd have banned him for the rest of the competition; it needs drastic action like that to make players rethink their actions. You couldn't fine someone like Rivaldo enough to hurt him, so you need to hurt him in another way. Taking away his chance to play in the biggest tournament in the world would have done that. My thoughts on simulation are this: the first time a player does it in a season, he gets banned for say, two games. If he offends again in the same season, he gets a five-match ban. If he does it again, he misses ten games, and so on. Players like Ronaldo will be forced to clean up their act if they don't want to spend most of their career on the sideline, and managers will have a real reason to clamp down on cheating in their ranks: would you want a player to risk diving to win a pen if it meant he'd be unable to play for the next two months?

How can Blatter have the cheek to criticise England for being negative when Portugal are still in the competition? When we were down to ten men and for the taking, they didn't even have a striker on the pitch until the last few minutes of normal time! I could take being knocked out if it happened in a different way for once, but it's the same every time.

Strength in debt? Well, they have done pretty well since the Argentine banks crashed...