The Moorings The Moorings is situated on Bolton Road about a ten to fifteen minute walk from Ewood Park and has its own car park with room for about 30 cars (or 25 cars and a badly parked police van on matchdays). It has undergone a transformation in recent months from an unpopular, badly decorated pub to one of the most highly acclaimed and successful Italian Restaurants on the car park and back again. The only clues to its former existence are the slight smell of garlic in the John Smiths and the strange accents of the doormen, Toni “Big Nose” Schnozelli and Jimmy “Kneecaps” Patello. The Moorings is spacious with a large bar and a separate restaurant area overlooking the canal which serves food on matchdays. There is often post-match entertainment from a host of unknown local singers and musicians like Johnny Sax and his Sax – so it’s probably best to go elsewhere after the match (there’s usually a decent punch-up in The Infirmary pub across the road which may be preferable). Pre-match entertainment includes the popular “Guess the Charity” – which of Blackburn’s well deserving charities will the roly-poly charity lady be supporting this week? Under-nourished donkeys appeal? Schizophrenics of Livesey Branch Road? Royal Society for Prevention of Paddy-field Injuries? If you guess right you have to put a pound in her collection tin. I’ve only won once. Damn that Save Our Souness fund!! If that still hasn't put you off, you can normally find Scotty and me in there on matchdays reminiscing about the times they used to have TVs and that blonde barmaid . Directions: Leave the M65 at junction 4 – see the naked bloke on the sandstone block? Is his arse in the air or what?! Take the last exit of the roundabout and turn right at the traffic lights into Bolton Road (A666). Proceed past Ewood Park and get in the rightmost lane at the next set of traffic lights. The road bends round to the right and becomes three lanes as livesey branch road joins (watch out for schizophrenics crossing here) – take the centre lane which becomes the right lane at the next set of lights. Continue along Bolton road under the railway bridge and notice the Royal Infirmary on the right – you might need this if you choose against “Jonny Sax”. The Moorings is on left about 100 yards beyond the next set of lights. After the game I find it easier to head for Preston Road and onto the M6 rather than dodge the schizophrenics again: Turn right out of the Car Park and Left onto Bolton Road. At the first set of traffic lights turn left into Freckleton St. Follow the road round and turn right at the end and then first left at the traffic lights. Bear Left at the next set of lights and turn left at the lights at the top of the hill onto Preston Road.

Great preview Bob. A very good read despite being slightly overshadowed by what has been happening off the field and the sudden wave of optimism that it has generated. (Nothing much you could have done about that though – how could you have predicted the re-opening of The Moorings?!) It brought back some great memories and the realization that a large number the members of this messageboard weren’t even born made me feel very old. Thanks for that! I’m really looking forward to tomorrow’s game with all that’s happened this week (as well as The Moorings re-opening, Rovers have apparently appointed a new manager!!). As Bob said in his preview, there should be a brilliant atmosphere (although I expect a few empty seats with the assassination having been cancelled) and I think that will inspire the team onto a convincing 2-1 win.

Sparky may have a little money to spend in January but until then he will have to wee with the willy he’s inherited. Now, I’m no expert on such things, but I imagine when you inherit someone else’s willy, it’s a little difficult to handle at first (as Tony P proved with that limp display at St. James’ Park). Hughes has got roughly a day and a half to practice with it, then he’s got to make it perform in public on Saturday afternoon. Let’s hope he gets it right or we could get pi**ed on!

Scandinavia. Right next to Lapland. Bloody Hell !! I think I've sent the Welsh FA my letter to Santa!! I hope they don't read it out!!

Wales might be in a different time zone. Does anyone know where it is?

Fair point Flopsy but I do think this needs clearing up. If we don't know what constitutes Scandinavia then it casts serious doubts over where Lapland is and if we don't know where Lapland is, where the Hell do I send my letter to Santa. I'm all of fluster about this I can tell you. All I can find is this map of Scandinavia which doesn't really help much at all.

Couldn't you have started a new thread for that Hughesy? We don't want chants cluttering up the Who Do You Want As Our New Manager thread!

About page 70 he was quoted in the Mirror:- That seems to rule out God and Felicity Kendall which were my favourites.

No way BobF. Could prove very costly! Imagine the headline "Hoddle tops Rovers fans' poll". JW thinks "Hoddle!?! - I hadn't thought of him!". Hoddle gets appointed and you have to fork out for a sniper's rifle.

Also Ponderous-Looking: Ponderous-looking 1. Appearing deep in thought, concentrating. 2. Brown, Sticky stuff. (eg. Lucas Neill is a pile of ponderous-looking)

What are his odds on SkyBet?!

When I was at school, all we had on mobiles were cut-out spaceships or teddy-bears. Kids are spolit these days. Is this activity different to other mornings this week Stroppy?

Well my little lad was out in the garden half-heartedly sanding down the back fence. My wife went over to inspect it and, when he asked her what she thought, she turned and yelled: IT'S SO BOBBLY! RUB SON! But I didn't read anything into it.

If memory serves, he's a worm at the bottom of the garden.

That's convinced me Strachan is the one. For a start, he'll want to come to Blackburn to be re-united with his ear and secondly a quote from the above link, if I've translated correctly, shows us what kind of a leader he is. "Craving the end of a little half-squirrel which was already stunned, some men took four hammers of iron but the porridge man named Strachan rode in and did the job with his hands. His dad threw up."

Surely Souness will be advising Newcastle on tactics for Saturday’s game even if he hasn’t officially taken over as manager. I expect to see his influence on the starting line-up – Given in goal, Shearer up-front and everyone else liberally scattered down the left flank. As long as we don’t employ our own question-mark formation to counter theirs we could be 3 or 4 goals to the good by half-time. If both teams do start with the question-mark, it will be interesting to see what happens when the ball rolls to a halt in the centre of the park (probably from an inch perfect Tugay pass to his imaginary friend) – will anyone dare to venture from the touchline to get it? It could get quite dull if they don’t - the imaginary friend hacking away at the ball and Tugay roaring him on from the left wing. The second half is sure to be hard-fought with numerous penalty appeals waved away by the referee as Shearer and Dickov try to outdo each other with outrageous penalty area diving. Now that our penalty jinx has transferred to Newcastle, I reckon Dickov will probably just edge it on the day with a double-pike, triple-axle juggernaut with arms akimbo dismount (I think that’s right - I paid a lot of attention to the Olympic Games) but then hit the bar with our first penalty for 12 years. The score then? Probably 2-0 to Newcastle.

I’ve been away on holiday - far away from all contact with the civilized world, t’internet and football-related news. Where the only company was the occasional strange-looking beast lumbering past, seemingly oblivious to my presence. The air was alive with a strange buzzing sound from some indeterminable source. The only other sound in this humid, desolate place was a strange, child-like laughter emanating from the Fireman Sam Carousel. Imagine my surprise when I got home from St. Annes Pier to find that Blackburn Rovers was in complete disarray – even more so than when I left. Yorke gone, Souey gone and Deano on his way. I can’t bring myself to be disappointed at Souey’s departure but I’m obviously as disappointed and disgusted as everyone else that Deano is to follow him to Newcastle. I think it’s a disgrace if Rovers allow him and his innovations to leave and I will definitely not be buying a new kit now. At least not until I know whether he’s taken his Deanoglue™ with him. I’m nervous about who the new man in charge might be. Some of the names mentioned are uninspiring to say the least. Houllier? Please no! My own choice would be Strachan. I can never tell what he says but, when it’s translated and printed in the papers, it’s normally funny and I like that.

It’s probably too early in the season to be talking about “must win” games but this is definitely one we must not lose. I’ve been pro-Souness up to now but if we lose this one through unfathomable tactics, ridiculous substitutions or conceding more goals than the opposition I’m going to get really cross, then really disappointed and then really depressed. I will be calling for Souey’s head before Sunday. It’s not the 1 point from 4 games that worries me or the fact that we look like relegation fodder two weeks into the season. I can cope with that but I’m due to fly out to Spain to stay with ManU-supporting friends next week. If we lose, I’ll have to pack the wife off on her own and have my holiday on St. Annes pier. If I have to spend yet another holiday playing the 2p roulette and riding the Fireman Sam carousel then I’m sorry but Souey’s got to go. My prediction then: Rovers 1 – 2 Man U Souey gone by Friday Fireman Sam carousel broken by Tuesday. That game where you roll a 2p onto a moving, striped belt and try to land it between (but not touching) the black lines fails to pay out again even when the 2p is slap-bang in the middle. It owes me 14p that thing.

The question mark formation is definitely worth a try. With one touch passing up the left wing we can quickly and easily move the ball from front to back. Then a cross-field ball should find Emerton unmarked with just the keeper to beat. He can then take his take his time, pick his spot and lay it back to Short. EDIT: Just noticed Short has not been included in the Question Mark formation! Souey Out!! As for the game itself. So'ton 1 v 1 Rovers.

Friedel: Looking to be lacking mobility and couldn’t kick it. That can’t be ideal for a footballer. Blameless for the goal and saved Amo’s blushes. 6/10 Gray: Reasonable performance. Got forward well and put in a couple of crosses 6/10 Short: Good, solid, professional performance. Great run for the goal. Clinical finish with his right ear. 8/10 Amoruso: Did well apart from dodgy backpass but failed to score when my money was on him for first goal. Unacceptable. 1/10 Emerton: For God’s sake shoot....! Or cross….! Or take the full-back on….! Laying it off to Short and making a 3-yard sprint towards goal is not a sound attacking ploy! 4/10 Ferguson: A captain’s performance. Lead by example. If someone takes a free-kick very hard in the direction of your left nipple, correct procedure is to duck away like a nancy and I think he showed the lads how you do it beautifully. 6/10 Gresko: Didn’t do much wrong. Didn’t do much right. Didn’t do much. 6/10 Matteo: Must have very bad breath. Every time he breathed on Kanu, the Nwankwo fell over. 5/10 De Pedro: Emo could have a challenger in the Opta stats for most crosses this season. One was within 20 yards of its target too! Did a nice little thingamyjig over on the right wing at one point. 4/10 Yorke: Worked hard!!!!!! 8/10 Stead: Limited to one half shot on the turn from 30 yards (although he might just have been break-dancing when the ball hit him) and crossed for the goal. 5/10 Tugay: Looked determined when he came on and controlled midfield apart from a couple of wayward passes best summed up by the sky sports commentary : “Tugay, the Turkish midfielder, can pass on a sixpence” as the ball sailed out of play 20 yards ahead of and 10 yards above the nearest Rovers player. Maybe his imaginary friend has put some height on during the close season…? (7/10) Dickov: Did all you could ask of him. Challenged hard. Chased everything. Moaned to the ref. Sat on his arse in the area with his arms spread wide. (7/10) Gallagher: Received the ball. Lost the ball. Chased after the bloke with the ball. Not given much time to impress (6/10) Neill: Superb. Brilliant. Vast improvement on last season. (9/10)

I’m going for a tense, nail-biting 2-1 win for Rovers. Amo with a header from an Emerton corner on 2 mins to open the scoring in front of a poor crowd of 412 (if you include the 8 people on the hill behind the Riverside). Horsfield equalizes on 26mins. One of the blokes on the hill half celebrates and is set upon by the other 7. Crowd now 411. At half time someone happens to mention to Deano that it’s a poor show from the Blackburn public. Quick as a flash Deano realises he forgot to flick the Deanoswitch™ to activate the Deanocard™ readers. He rectifies his Deanomistake™ and the crowd quickly swells to 17,342. Stead completes the scoring on 54 mins. Crowd 14,104 (Riverside have gone).

It looks like "Agadoo" to me I'm afraid. It's the bit where you "push the pineapple" - I'm almost certain of it. Worryingly, MB seems to be enjoying it. The encouragement from behind is well out of order. You can almost hear Scotty saying "Go on MB. Do your Agadoo! It'll make great photograph."

My own theory is that Souey misheard and thought Glenn was having a pop at his summer facelift. “Graeme, is your right ear too grey now?” He’s obviously embarrassed about it and the evil look was a mild response in the circumstances.

Have you noticed, if you type that number into a calculator and turn it upside-down, it says "BLEB" - which is how you pronounce your name after 6 pints of Guinness!!

I believe negotiations were at an advanced stage when the meeting broke up for elevenses. In came the tea lady with a trolley of coffees, biscuits and Deanofruit. Snow White chose an apple and fell immediately into some sort of coma. Grumpy is livid about it and is now unlikely to sign. Happy is delighted that Grumpy is staying put. Sneezey hasn't had chance to comment. Bashful hid under the table. Doc tried to wake Snow White up. Sleepy saw the chance to grab 40 winks. and Dickov returned to training.