[Archived] Man Has Sex With A Bike

[LeftWinger]

Click

Very strange man. However, why should he be placed on the sex offenders register when he's done it in his own room?

[ABBEY]

how the f can you shag a bike??

having said ive banged a few bikes in my time .

[Tim Southampton Rover]

brings a whole new meaning to 'riding a bike'

[ultrablue]

If it came down to a straight choice, which would you rather, bike or a pavement?

I'd choose aluminium or concrete anyday

[ABBEY]

If it came down to a straight choice, which would you rather, bike or a pavement?

I'd choose aluminium or concrete anyday

aye but a pavement always has a crack in it

[ultrablue]

aye but a pavement always has a crack in it

Good point, ah well gotta get back in the saddle.

[ABBEY]

you could always spoke her or superspoke her

[adopted scouser]

He must have had a big red chopper

[Billy Castell]

!

I wonder if the bike was a prostitute, and cost a penny and a farthing for such services? And I bet he was two tyred to hide the evidence of his liason. I expect he has earned a suspension from work,and that any girlfriend or wife spoke harsh words to him upon finding out. No doubt this story will be wheeled out on numourous occaisions.

[Cookiemonster]

I wonder if the cycle was bi?

[Anti-Dingle-Brigade]

The depths Vinjay has stooped to since the David Williams rumours began.

The article was written poorly, they spelt Burnley horribly wrong.

[Seggie]

Maybe he was into chains

[colin]

Lawks!

I can sort of understand how blokes end up in casualty with a vacuum cleaner attachment firmly fixed to the honorable member, but what part of a bike could possibly be used?

Take the saddle off perhaps. He'd have to have a very small winkie though.

I suppose it makes the rest of us seem normal.

[Blueboy Downunder]

that report in the newspaper never actually said that he was trying to have sex with a bike and the bits that are in inverted commas (or whatever you call it) says he was immitating sex. since when can someone be put away for 'immitating" the act of shagging....regardless of who or what it is with. having a ham shank would have been far less damage....this is rediculous.

[Cheshireblue]

And why call the police? Just take the ###### out of him for the rest of his life. That's punishment enough, and far more appropriate.

[RoversFanUSA]

Man you English sure know how to party!!!

[Guest Dik Bleek]

You should visit the red light area of Amsterdam it would answer all your questions and more !

[Mc Love]

Was the man in question a burnley supporter??

[Wolverine]

having a ham shank would have been far less damage

Its quite a novel way of lubricating the chain though... Maybe he had no WD40 left.

I am more concerned with his love for pavements, though. Being put on the sex offenders register seems a bit much, as he only goes for inanimate objects. Then again, that puts Lorenzo Amoruso at severe risk...

[blue phil]

Man you English sure know how to party!!!

Get it right , mate . This bloke was a jock .....

Mind you the pavement chappie was English , though........

[yoda]

Has anybody asked the bike's o pinion

[RoversFanUSA]

Get it right , mate . This bloke was a jock .....

Mind you the pavement chappie was English , though........

What does him being a "jock" have anything to do with humping a bike? Are they sure hes scottish? Mabye they made a mistake and hes really just from New Castle...LOL . As for the pavement chappie, he WAS english and thats what i ment. You all know how to REALLY PARTY!! Now mind you we have are fair share of weird F's out here humping things that probley should be eather...YIKES!

[LeftWinger]

Sentenced

3 Years on Probation

[Wolverine]

How long until he is back in the saddle?

[roversmum]

This has completely foxed me. If the bloke wanted to stimulate sex using a bike in a locked room whose business is it but his? It hasn't damaged anyone else except possibly part of his own anatomy - .

If the police wanted something to do I'd rather they were out looking for burglars or tracking those yobs whose one aim in life is to make others' lives a misery.......