Don't forget your helmet though Sparky.

Groo, wouldn't want to dissuade you from having a healthy dislike of Spuds but..... it was discussed (probably a few hundred pages ago) on the transfer topic and might be in this one but I can't be bothered to look, he only had 1 year to run on his contract. It was widely agreed if he'd have had a couple of years of contract left then fair market value would have been something around £5 million.

It's either Doris or Spenny reincarnated. How did we dare to finish so high last season? It's all down from here you know.

Tip for you Murray - turn the telly volume off and have the Five Live commentary on. Plus : no annoying gits like Wright and Jonathan Pearce but the minus is that for some reason the radio is a couple of seconds ahead of the TV so when Lampard is lining up a shot on the telly, you hear the groans as it ends up in row Z on the radio.

What I heard was the withdrawn confession wasn't quite so clear cut, presty. He amended it to say he couldn't be sure, it could have been some other bloke that he bricked (rather than the one Mr Shields got convicted for doing). Hence Mr Shields can't be acquitted on that.

Allan, see page 10 of the Premiership Final Table prediction thread.

Marvellous stuff Bob. Mods, hope you aren't considering putting a release clause in the contract.

A nomination for a journalist's award...... I can't see it on this thread, but last July someone posted a link to an article in the Manchester Eveving News - "Mark's shock troops" by Paul Hince. Here's the first paragraph - Wonder if he put money on it? Anyway, his second part of the above is a bit over the top but I suspect we were top of the bad boys league.

Let’s see how the Preston hairdresser’s predictions panned out. He’s given us all a laugh during the course of the season and I think you’ll agree it all adds up to something truly comical. So just to explain…… First up is the real end of season table - P GD pts Chelsea 38 50 91 Man Utd 38 38 83 Liverpool 38 32 82 Arsenal 38 37 67 Tottenham 38 15 65 Blackburn 38 9 63 Newcastle 38 5 58 Bolton 38 8 56 West Ham 38 -3 55 Wigan 38 -7 51 Everton 38 -15 50 Fulham 38 -10 48 Charlton 38 -14 47 Middlesbrough 38 -10 45 Man City 38 -5 43 Aston Villa 38 -13 42 Portsmouth 38 -25 38 Birmingham 38 -22 34 West Brom 38 -27 30 Sunderland 38 -43 15 Second, now bear in mind that Lawrenson didn’t make any predictions till September. Most teams had played 4 games before then. Taking those first games out of the picture (and so there is a fair comparison), here’s what the table would look like without those games - P GD pts Chelsea 34 42 79 Man Utd 34 33 74 Liverpool 34 31 78 Arsenal 34 33 61 Tottenham 34 13 58 Blackburn 34 11 59 Newcastle 34 11 57 Bolton 34 10 49 West Ham 34 -2 51 Wigan 34 -6 48 Everton 34 -13 47 Fulham 34 -7 44 Charlton 34 -20 38 Middlesbrough 34 -8 41 Man City 34 -8 33 Aston Villa 34 -13 37 Portsmouth 34 -21 37 Birmingham 34 -19 30 West Brom 34 -24 27 Sunderland 34 -38 15 And so to the table according to Lawrenson - P GD pts Chelsea c34 54 88 Arsenal c34 47 84 Man Utd c34 40 79 Liverpool c34 32 73 Everton c34 12 60 Bolton W c34 6 56 Newcastle c34 3 54 Tottenham c34 9 50 Birmingham c34 -8 44 Portsmouth c34 -13 40 Charlton c34 -11 39 Fulham c34 -11 38 Man City c34 -15 36 Blackburn c34 -11 34 Aston V c34 -21 33 Wigan A c34 -17 30 WBA c34 -23 26 West Ham c34 -17 25 Middlesboro c34 -27 25 Sunderland c34 -33 22 and finally a table to show the difference between the real world and the 34 games Lawrenson predicted (positive numbers indicate reality was better than Lawrenson and vice versa) – P GD pts West Ham c34 15 26 Blackburn c34 22 25 Wigan A c34 11 18 Middlesbrough c34 19 16 Tottenham c34 4 8 Fulham c34 4 6 Liverpool c34 -1 5 Aston V c34 8 4 Newcastle c34 8 3 WBA c34 -1 1 Charlton c34 9 -1 Man City c34 7 -3 Portsmouth c34 -8 -3 Man Utd c34 -7 -5 Bolton W c34 4 -7 Sunderland c34 -5 -7 Chelsea c34 -12 -9 Everton c34 -25 -13 Birmingham c34 -11 -14 Arsenal c34 -14 -23 So West Ham and us did much better than the hairdresser predicted whilst Birmingham and especially Arsenal did much worse. Or an alternative view is that he had a real downer on West Ham and us whilst being far too positive about Arsenal and to a lesser extent Brum. Well that’s the non-emotional view anyway. Fire away with other views.

That hairdresser's an insightful bugger isn't he........ More quality punditry, cutting edge stuff, could someone remind me why the BBC pay this bloke?

And the Beeb tend to agree, from Rovers v City preview........

This might be a suitable place to put the table according to Lawrenson - I'll get busy early next week as well Philly!

Careful Laurence, you could give Jim a thrombo suggesting our defensive heart might be Antipodean. Flopsy, you're just too damned pessimistic - I can think of at least five draws (Trelleborgs, Warsaw, both legs vs Sofia, Genclerbirligi)

Joey, NEILL. Perhaps he won't be around for too much longer for me to keep getting annoyed.

Eddie, what's the difference between a break and a fracture?

Joey, if the Axe had played defensive mid recently I agree it might make sense for him to start. But can't remember him even starting a game recently, let alone playing in that position (stand to be corrected). So 442 for me with Pongo joining Bellamy up front, Kuqi if Pongo is ill/out of favour. By the way Joey, repeat ad infintum N E I L L.

Largely agree FLB, but a few months ago (I haven't got time or inclination to find it) I said something like I'd be happy if going into the last game, we knew a win would guarantee us a UEFA Cup spot. And I still would be. Yes, the last few games have been disappointing but I'm a glass half full chap when it comes to the season overall : finishing 6th - 8th would be one hell of an achievement, only in the context of things a month ago is 7th a blow.

Courtesy of the Daily Telegraph........... Wonder if he's an asylum seeker ? EDIT : beaten to it by Mr Florida

A thought that had crossed my mind too - pretty costly. Thought it a bit ironic that in the same week that the decision went against us in the Dahlin case on appeal, this cost us a bob or two when we couldn't go to appeal. So that's two games against Lpool this season, and two 1-0 defeats that have owed a hell of a lot to diabolical decisions from the men in black - the conspiracy theories are growing...........

Stuart Pearce vs San Marino?

Wasn't it MGP v Burnley? Not sure, someone will no doubt google and confirm.

Dillo, if you're spending any time in Blackburn, I'd recommend a visit to Blackburn Indoor Market, the food part anyway. Must admit I haven't been for a year or two so bow to local knowledge if things have changed a bit, but there were stalls that sold locally made Lancashire cheese, sarsaparilla, and black pudding (just don't ask what goes into black pudding!) - all are local 'specialities' and posters more local than me can maybe recommend which stalls to visit. I take no responsibility if any of these put you off Rovers though!

Don't panic OJ, I'm keeping tabs. It's under control. Just briefly for now - he's got us sixth bottom on 27 points (teams below us are Villa, Boro, West Ham, West Brom and Sunderland). I'll post something at the end of the season.

Marvellous find Colin! I had that report bookmarked and for about a year after the game it was still there. Disappeared a few years ago but I remember that Graham Branch comment - a gem, as is the one about Kevin Ball. You don't get journalism like that anymore .

And I've been wondering all day if I was seeing things last night. I sit near the BE of the JW Lower but that linesman (JW side, Darwen End half) must have had his flag up for at least 10 seconds before the corner. What was going on? I don't think it's unfair to say it must have put off our lads at the back at the least. Read quite a few reports today and no mention. Meanwhile, Kuqi, for all his faults, pops up with another point-earning goal. It's a good habit to have.